Car saga

There are few things more disconcerting than driving a car that you expect to die on you at any moment. Especially when it has already broken down at a busy junction in the Monday morning rush hour. Neither Sharon nor I have felt the love for the Mazda 6 since I bought it last April. True, it is a good size for all the boys to fit in and has a great boot, but over the winter months it has been increasingly erratic when starting from cold. Generally it would cut out once or twice before I got the boys to school and, in the evening, I couldn't get it out the car park without it stalling.

Then, on Monday, it completely died on me at the junction of Midmar Drive and Blackford Road and would not restart. I finally got pushed to the side of the road by a couple of helpers and phoned the AA. I managed to get started after about ten minutes and limped into work with a few touch and go moments on Lothian Road and on entry to the car park. I redirected the AA man to come to my car park but it was no good. He couldn't fathom what the problem was and so we had to push it out of the car park so he could tow it up to GW Martin's garage for me.

Gerry Martin had a look at it on Tuesday but couldn't find an obvious fault. They changed the fuel filter and got it running so I picked it up, although, ominously, after sitting on the forecourt for a couple of hours, it wasn't a fluent start. Cue some serious internet research which didn't make for particularly inspiring reading. My symptoms seemed to point to a fuel pump problem of which there seemed to be no shortage for the Mazda 6. And neither was there an easy fix. My attention focused in on a faulty suction control valve (SCV) problem and when Wednesday's cold morning left me back at square one, my thoughts turned to replacing the Mazda. I had spotted an Audi A4 estate on the books of our old friends at Mackinnon Costello and duly arranged a test drive for lunchtime. It was exactly what I was looking for - a solid Audi build, a decent 1.9 litre diesel engine, in perfect nick with the timing belt done and 67060 miles on the clock. OK, so it was going to be a bit cramped for the boys and the boot was a fair bit smaller than the Mazda but it was just a pleasure to turn the key and start smoothly. The problem was getting the Mazda in a fit state to trade in.

Gerry Martin suggested I try Lawson Diesel off Bonnington Road. When I called them and told them the problem and what I thought might be the cause they concurred, saying they'd had a few problems like that with the Mazda and others. They had the part in stock so I bussed over there to collect it. £192 including VAT, but given they would charge £250 plus VAT to fit it, and I still had to get my car going, I decided to just pick up the part and see if I could get the car to Morningside. Back home then, and with the sun shining on the bonnet the warmth did the trick. I got the car started but it was another torturous journey of coasting to junctions and red lights and trying my damnedest not to stall the car. Somehow I got to GW Martin's without blocking Comiston Road or Morningside Road.

On Thursday morning they phoned. Fifteen minutes to fit the new suction control valve and the car started first time, depsite the cold. When I picked it up later it was running perfectly, like there had never been a problem. At least they never charged me for the fitting, given that I had previously forked out £95 for the new fuel filter which had failed to fix the problem. So I had the satisfaction of finding the solution to the problem but it was too late to change my mind about the Mazda which seemed destined to have more DPF (Diesel Particulate Filter) problems as it got older. DPFs were introduced into Japanese cars in 2005, some two years before European cars, due to more stringent environmental regulations in the Far East. So, to trade the Mazda in for the 55-plate Audi made sense to me, even if I was a few thousand quid out of pocket.

A week I could do without repeating.

Long hot Saturday

I was up early on the Saturday morning for a golf date withe Pete. So early, in fact, that I was first in the restaurant for breakfast at 0630. Having enjoyed that, fortification for the day ahead, I got a taxi out to the Els Club in Dubai Sports City for 7.30 to meet Pete and knock some balls on the range. It was unpleasantly warm even then as I adjusted to the hire clubs. Fortuntely we had buggies, otherwise I would have been done for by the first tee. Joining us to make up a four, it turned out, was David Provan and Paul Darling, fellow PC guests from Sharon's team.

The course was long and set up for a competition that was off straight after us. Pins behind bunkers on 200 yard par threes with lightning greens weren't going to do us any favours. I struggled all day, managing only one par and pretty much giving up the ghost as the mercury passed the 40 degree mark. The fairways were cut through a half-occupied estate of identikit cube-shaped villas, and bounded by sandy wasteland. Enter there at your peril. The temperature rose even higher if you dared seek a wayward drive amidst the scrub. By the end I was capable of raising the club and letting it fall on the ball, not to much effect. The others fared better by degrees but the Bermuda grass and hogs back greens and 6800 yards and desert heat were too much for me!

I bade Pete farewell and taxied back to the Madinat with David and Paul. Sharon had a bot of a late night and then a morning working out in the, fortuntely, air-conditioned gym. We ended up having a lazy afternoon, me more so than Sharon who headed out while I caught up with some much-needed zeds.

After 4pm we reconvened in reception, by the pool of petals, beneath the domed ceiling with its map of the UAE painted on it, before transferring to our Toyota Landcruisers for the drive into the desert. On the way we passed a lorry, recently tipped over on the road - not the most heartening sight before taking to the dunes in a high-powered car!

We paused briefly to let the air out the tyres, so that the cars would have more traction through the soft sand, then we reloaded the cars and were off, the anthill mob following one another over the dunes. Our driver was good fun and up for a bit of egging on, more so than some of the others who were going through the motions. It wasn't particularly life-threatening but we had a few slides and jolts and near misses with the lethargic driver in front as we would our way deeper into the dunes. Eventually we stopped in the desert for some refreshments as the sun dipped sharply towards the horizon. Sharon and I, and Hannah and Gavin and Alain and Graham, clambered on to the backs of some camels to lead the party up and over a dune in the dusk, to enter the caravanserai which was the scene for the evening's entertainment. The camel ride was more alarming than the dune bashing and I think I ended up with mild whiplash as the camel plunged to its knees, Sharon yelling in front of me.

We were seated at long tables in the open air, beneath the desert sky. Many of the ladies availed themselves of the henna tattoos that were on offer, in between partaking of the barbecued meats, curries and various Middle Eastern dishes that were being served up. In the midst of it all we were treated to some belly dancing. Fortunately, this didn't turn into audience participation - we were content to watch the two dancers do their thing. One was considerably better than the other. After the festivities we slowly cleared the camp and returned to the jeeps. Again, some drivers were more up for it than others: slaloming through the sand (because, our driver claimed, he was driving on full tyres and needed to keep swerving to avoid being stuck) and driving for prolonged periods with their lights off - a rather scary prospect in the black night of the desert.

Once back at the hotel, a few went in search of TV coverage of the Champions League Final while we went to Anne Marie's room. I had to content myself with watching the penalty shoot out by crowd reaction. The best CNN could do was film people's reactions as they watched the denoument in bars in Germany and Kenya. As it happened, Chelsea won. It was a long and tiring day in the sun for me.

Audi sold

Another must-do for this summer is to go camping with the boys. I dug out my old two-man tent to see if that was still serviceable. It is, but memory serves me that it had a leak somewhere, which could do with being fixed given the long range forecast for this summer. I bought a two-ring cooker and some cookware and a windbreak, so I've gradually compiled most of the gear. I now need to bite the bullet and get out there! I did manage to leave my credit card in Go Outdoors after this purchase,and it was several days before I realised and then was able to track it down. Minor panic with the trip to London and Dubai looming.

Sharon has been back doing some running, testing out the repaired foot. She managed to get round Arthur's Seat this week but the "good" foot is now giving her some pain. As the surgeon said, he doesn't have the experience of his patients asking about running after their operations, with them generally being about twenty years older than Sharon.

We've put on a couple of dinners recently, with the St.Johns round and then Ruth and Norman Martin, Anne-Marie and Hannah on another occasion. May often seems to be our time for entertaining, especially in the run-up to the Pampered Chef incentive trip. Sharon's excitement is mounting as the days go by and the outfits are considered and discussed (not, generally, with me).

I had some rare time alone with Rowan while his bigger brothers were at their golf and Angus was with Sharon. We went down to Ocean Terminal, where unfortunately the soft play has closed and the juggling ball has gone! This was a ball stuck on a pillar outside the windows - someone must have removed it. Rowan and I had lunch at the handmade burger co., overlooking a submarine in the dock. It was nice just to get him on his own for once and interact with him. Too often his head is buried in his Nintendo DS or he is distracted by his brothers for him to talk any sense to you.

I sold my Audi Avant on e-bay for its reserve price of £500 to a chap from North Edinburgh. Subsequent to making the purchase he mumped and moaned about me not having truthfully represented the car's condition but he had the opportunity to look the car over before handing over the cash, so, galling as it is to be traduced somewhat, it was sold as seen. And if it hadn't developed the oil leak I'd have preferred to keep it as it was a better drive than the Mazda 6, albeit with a more thirsty engine.

I had a quick repeat visit to the Michelin-starred Castle Terrace restaurant for a "Big Data" dinner hosted by Oracle, with some of my peers from Edinburgh organisations. It was quite an interesting evening with good food to boot!

Snow fair on my birthday

I didn't expect to see snow when I opened the curtains on my birthday but there it was, on the hills and gardens. It wasn't as bad as last year's, which at least was expected, after a long winter, but given March's mild moments I could have been treated with a bit of sunshine. Alas no. It was a cold drive to work, a full day's work and then home again. Sharon did take me out in the evening however, to the Michelin-starred Castle Terrace restaurant in, well, Castle Terrace.

It is the first one-star Michelin restaurant we've dined in, having only managed a couple of 2-star places up till now (Andrew Fairlie at Gleneagles and the Piccolo Lago in Italy). The service was excellent and the food very tasty indeed. Apart from a curious bunch of Japanese youngsters making their way dully through the tasting menu at the next table, when not playing games on their mobiles and/or falling asleep, we had a thoroughly enjoyable evening. A slight downside is that I'm "aff the drink" so I didn't sample any of the wine. On the two occasions this year that I've had one bottle of cider, my gout has flared up within a couple of days. It is no coincidence, I fear, so I've been avoiding alcohol ever since. Whether this becomes permanent remains to be seen but I'm not exactly missing it.

As a birthday treat and partly because it is bonus payment time and my Audi has now tipped over the 100k mark, I've bought the Patersons' Mazda 6. It's a bit bigger that the Audi, an estate but with a diesel engine, slightly less powerful and therefore slightly cheaper to run than the Audi (I hope). It's also got 40k miles fewer on the clock and is 8 years' younger. The monkey on my back is now how I sell the Audi as paying the insurance on three cars is hefty. I think Sean is a bit young to get a provisional licence and a 2.4 litre V6 engine might be a bit too powerful for him to learn to drive on, so I'll have to sell it rather than leave it to rust on the drive for the next few years.

Cub camp

Sean set out on his first cub camp on Friday evening, up to Bonaly with 17 of his peers from the South Morningside troop. He seems to enjoy the cubs and has been really looking forward to the camp. In the event, he was in a room with five of his class-mates from school. They were staying in a lodge rather than in tents. Needless to stay they were up very late, past midnight on the Friday and just before it on the Saturday. He had a great time. They had Olympic-themed teams and tasks, inspections and cooking and tidying up and he just loved it. Sharon and Angus went to collect him on the Sunday and Sharon said they sat down by a stream and the normally taciturn Sean ("How was blah?" "Fine") went into overload, describing what he had done. I've yet to persuade him to write it all down here for posterity.

Sharon had her own thrills on Saturday when, on the last leg of her road trip up the M74 to Glasgow, the drive shaft sheared while she was in the outside lane. With Lilias in the car, Sharon calmly navigated across three lanes of traffic and a joining slip, with only the car's existing momentum to get her to safety. Fortunately she made it without mishap. The AA were called and towed her to a Halfords garage in Glasgow, near Hampden. No chance of getting it fixed so she had to make it to her night out in Glasgow and home on the Sunday by train. It meant she was able to take Angus on "a big 'venture" on Tuesday, getting the bus into town and the train through to Glasgow, then another bus. He was a star man throughout, tiring in Glasgow (the finger goes in the mouth), but perking up at a MacDonalds (the first Wallace child to venture over the threshold of such an establishment) and a soft play. Irritatingly the car was not fixed, the actual source of the problem being a part attached to the drive shaft. Sharon demanded a courtesy car and drove home to cram all the boys in it and take them to swimming. She returned to Glasgow today to pick up the Sharan, £675 lighter.

I was up at Bonaly on Monday with Finn and Rowan for the Beavers' sausage sizzle. It was a balmy evening. There was a scavenger hunt which turned into a Rowan hunt (easily distracted, as ever, he disappeared off to do something he found more interesting) then we sizzled our sausages and sang songs round the campfire. It was good to see Finn join in the singing this year rather than sit with his thumb in and Rowan certainly enjoyed himself. He'll be heading to Beavers in the autumn.

Not surprisingly, Sean has been rather grumpy this week. Add the clocks going forward to his lack of beauty sleep at Cub Camp and you can see why!

Near miss

Following my hospital visit I took an extra day off work to recover my strength, having had no food for an extended period of time. It was a glorious day, part of a tremendous week of mild weather which put all thoughts of snowdrifts far behind me as I got all the bikes out of the garage and spent a considerable period of time getting the tires pumped up and various saddles and handlebars tightened.

I had Angus for company as Sharon took the other three to their swimming lessons after school. You have to keep an eye on Angus to make sure he doesn't wander out on to the pavement and road and he was watching me from the edge of the driveway as I was talking to Sandy and Fae across the road. A few minutes later, once I had returned to the tire pumping (using the automatic pump running off Sharon's car battery), there was a loud bang and I looked up to see Sandy's Audi on our side of the street. The handbrake hadn't been on properly and the car had rolled out of the drive, across the street, arcing slightly downhill, and crashed into Bob's wall just a yard or so down from our boundary, knocking a couple of the top stones seriously askew and breaking the mortar and moving the supporting blocks beneath. It was just a few yards away from where Angus had been standing minutes before and had happened so quietly that if you had been facing the wrong way you wouldn't have known it was coming.

The car itself was remarkably unscathed and, thankfully, so was Angus. The boot was open as Sandy had been in the middle of unloading some plants when it rolled away. It just goes to show how close you can be to completely unforeseen tragedy.

More car misery

I had hoped that 2010 was the year of the car problem and that 2011 would be more fruitful and less expensive on that front. Alas no. Sharon had to go to a show in Castle Douglas today but my battery was flat so she ended up taking her car, leaving me feeling rather stuck in the house with the boys. Fortunately Adrian has been here since Wednesday so he took the big boys out for a walk while Angus slept. On her return, Sharon elected to reverse into the drive so that I could jump start my car. However, she made contact with the wall which has left two doors of the Sharan severely scraped and dented. It looks expensive. I was able to get my car started, at least, although as it has now hit the 95,000 mile mark, I feel it is increasingly prone to old age. I'm still driving through the winter without any heating which isn't much fun.

Behind you

How not to impress your wife. Reverse her new car and turn it into a metal post, ripping off the front skirt, damaging the wing and smashing the side light. I managed this in the parking space for Sharon's office in Silvermills. Do not talk to me about car repairs (and don't ask for the loan of a tenner either).